


i'll be okay admiring from afar

by orphan_account



Category: Smosh
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, M/M, Pining, keiths an angsty lil ball, noahs v tired of people
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:48:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21772177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Noah wants a new look, and how could Keith say no to helping his best friend? It's not like he thought about how incredible Noah would look after- or how everyone else at school would notice too.
Relationships: Noah Grossman/Keith Leak Jr.
Comments: 12
Kudos: 65





	i'll be okay admiring from afar

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to diamond for giving me the idea in the first place like a month ago and for listening to me live-text my suffering on discord lmao

“How do you always look so… cool?”

That was not the question Keith was expecting from his friend as they sat outside a 7/11 trading snacks. Honestly, that’s not a question Keith ever thought he’d ever hear from Noah, so he’s a little thrown off.

“I’m not afraid of trying shit out,” Keith says with a shrug. “I know what looks good on me, and I know what doesn’t.” Noah still looks a little lost, and Keith’s a little nosy, so he decides to prod.

“Why’d you ask? You never ask me about fashion stuff. Actually, you just don’t talk about it.” Keith tilts his head and thinks back on their many, many conversations, trying to remember anything similar. His mental google search gets interrupted by Noah thumping his head against the headrest.

“I always got my brothers’ hand-me-downs growing up. I never got mad about it, but now I feel like everybody has their own ‘style’ and I just… don’t. And I don’t even know where to start!” Noah turns his whole body to face Keith, all wild gestures and bright eyes. “But you always look dope, so I figured you know how to shop for clothes other than boxers and socks.”

Keith turns his body with the foot he has resting on Noah’s dashboard so he’s facing Noah. “So, let me get this straight-”

“Good luck with that,” Noah interrupts. Keith reaches over and smacks him. Noah laughs. Keith still counts it as a victory.

“Dumbass. You want me to take you clothes shopping?” Keith asks. Noah shrugs.

“I guess? I mean, I need help, so…”

“Say no more.” Keith’s eyes were alight with a manic glee. “Actually, say one more thing: are you free Saturday?”

Noah laughs. “Bold of you to assume I would ever have weekend plans that didn’t include you.”

Keith tries hard not to flush at that.

He fails, but whatever. He has a plan now.

* * *

Keith knocks on Noah’s door bright and early Saturday morning, or like 11 am but that was early for him. Noah had to have been waiting for him, because he opens the door almost immediately with his keys in hand and a barely controlled grin on his face.

“Alright, fairy godmother, where to first?” Noah asks as he closes the door behind him. Keith socks him in the arm for the comment, but can't keep the fond smile off his face.

“First stop, we’re going downtown baby!”

They end up staying out until late that night shopping. Keith’s sure he’d never seen Noah so excited for anything that didn’t have to do with some sort of show. The boy bounced from place to place, grabbing all sorts of things off the shelves. Keith thought he would need to encourage him more, but Noah seemed plenty encouraged all by himself. It was nice to see Noah, who was always so insecure about how he looked, play around and find things he enjoyed.

(Keith made a joke about it at one of the stores. Noah responded with a sincere “I’m with you, of course I’m comfortable.” Keith may have choked on his drink immediately afterwards, but that had nothing to do with anything.

(Something similar may have happened when Keith insisted on paying for Noah’s clothes and the cashier made a comment about how she wished her boyfriend was so sweet. Again, no connection.)

(Shut up.)

By the end of the night, Noah had a heap of new clothes and plenty of outfits they had already talked about. Keith thought their shopping spree was for the night, but Noah insisted on making one more stop. Keith almost cries laughing when he sees that Noah’s mysterious final stop was their local Target. He reaches for the handle as Noah parks, but Noah grabs his shoulder.

“Wait! I’m, uh, I’m just gonna go in and grab something real quick,” Noah stutters. Keith raises an eyebrow at him, smelling some serious bullshit.

“Then why do I have to stay in the car?” Keith asks, half serious and half being petty. Noah pushes his head lightly and laughs at him.

“Cause if you came in with me, we’d be in there for like 2 hours and get kicked out.”

“That happened ONE TIME dude!” Keith says, but Noah was already out of the car. Keith resigns himself to chilling out and letting Noah be cryptic about whatever it was. Twelve minutes later, Noah comes back out with a bag that he throws in the trunk.

“You’re really gonna be all mystery man about this?” Keith asks as Noah gets back in the driver’s seat. “Let me guess, condoms and a 2 liter of lube.”

“You’re gross, dude,” Noah laughs.

“Nah, that’s you! Noah Grossdude,” Keith shoots back, leaning back in his seat. Noah smacks his shoulder as the old car shudders to life. Keith spends the rest of the car ride pestering Noah about the mystery bag, listing off increasingly absurd items that would embarrass Noah. By the time they pulled into Keith’s driveway, all the tension in Noah’s shoulders was gone, and his cheeks were flushed from laughter.

Keith clambers out of the car, then leans back in to say goodbye. Noah looks over at him, wild grin softening to a smile he only ever seems to give Keith. He ignores the way his stomach flips at the sight of his best friend softened by tiredness and streetlights.

“See you Monday, right?” Noah says. Keith nods and slaps the roof of the car and closes the door behind him. If he goes inside and screams into his pillow, then. Well, that’s nobody’s business.

* * *

Monday comes around and Keith’s just put most of his crap in his locker when he hears Noah call out his name. He turns around and… holy shit he looks incredible.

Noah’s got this blue, satiny bomber jacket with a gray button up underneath it and white skinny pants. He’s got boots too, the ones that Keith said he’d liked a lot and he so wants to think that’s why he’s wearing them cause wouldn’t that be awesome?

The thing that blows Keith away though is the Noah’s hair and his glasses. Noah always seemed insecure about his curly hair, trying to straighten it or put loads of product in it to make it smoother, and his glasses always seemed a little big for his face. Now, they fit perfect, with thinner frames that make them look way less bulky and so attractive it's upsetting. And his HAIR. There’s way less product than normal, so his curls are out in their full glory. And they’re bright. PINK. The top half of his shaved sides are now bleach blond, and the bottom half remain brown. It’s dorky, but looks so good at the same time. It’s so Noah that it makes Keith’s heart skip a beat.

Once Keith recovers, he sees he’s not the only one who noticed Noah’s transformation. As he walks down the hallway, a number of their classmates are turning to look at him. Hushed whispers are erupting, but Noah doesn’t seem to notice as he keeps walking to Keith with his huge, bright smile that Keith just had to smile back at him for. For once, he doesn’t care if he looks smitten cause right now, half the school does.

“Dude, you look incredible! I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were gonna dye your hair.” Keith reaches up to ruffle his hair. Noah swatts his hand away affectionately, but not before Keith’s tousled it up to his liking.

“Yeah, well, I had to surprise you with something. Keep you on your toes, old man.” Keith smacks Noah in the stomach as Noah laughs at his own joke.

“Watch your mouth, flat ass. I paid for your new gear!” They walked to their first class, bickering the whole way like nothing was different.

Noah continues walking around school with a new air of confidence. His jokes come more often, he stands a little straighter, he laughs a little louder. Keith’s thrilled for his friend, loves the way confidence looks on him even more than the clothes. But, he seethes at the way people glance at Noah in the hallway. He rolls his eyes when pretty girls in class titter at his jokes now, when they never did before. He stands a little closer when guys start coming up to Noah more often, inviting him to games and parties and leaving their hands on his shoulder for way longer than necessary. They never paid attention to him before, but now that he’s more appealing to look at, they’re gonna laugh and act like they like him all of the sudden?

(Even as Keith grows more and more jealous, he misses how Noah never actually directs any jokes towards the girls that giggle, but at him to make him laugh big and loud, like he likes. His eyes are shut so tight in his laughter that he doesn’t see Noah’s dopey grin watching him. He fails to notice that whenever the guys put their hands on his shoulder, he doesn’t reach back, but he’s always reaching out for Keith.)

* * *

Noah’s got his car parked with just the two of them once again, sharing shitty convenience store food as they sit on the hood and try to see stars in the LA sky. Well, Keith’s looking at the sky. When he turns his head to say something to Noah, he finds green-gray eyes looking right at him.

“What’s up?” Keith wants to make a joke, but the air feels too intimate, too important for that all of the sudden.

“You’ve been acting weird.” Noah says. There’s no hesitance in his voice when he says it. There never seems to be when he talks to Keith. Like there’s never a chance that he doesn’t know what’s going on in Keith’s head. It’s nice, and a little terrifying.

“I have?” Keith knows he has, but he’s still hoping if he plays dumb Noah will leave it alone. Unfortunately, Noah knows what types of stupid Keith is, so he sees right through him.

“Yeah. You have, dude.” Noah’s head turns up to the sky, but his eyes are closed now. “Is it cause of me? My new…” he waves at his whole body lamely, then lets his hand rest on his stomach.

“Yeah.” The answer is out before Keith can even think to lie to Noah. “Not in a, in a bad way though! You look dope dude, I love the whole thing you’ve got going. You’re more- more confident now, you walk with your head high, you’ve got every gorgeous person you pass lookin your way. I’m just-” Keith finally seems to get a handle on his damn mouth before he completely ruins his friendship, thank God. He clams up and looks back up at the sky, refusing to look over when he sees Noah turn again out of the corner of his eye.

“You’re just what?” Keith’s sure for a second he’s going to cry, just at the soft, almost scared shake of Noah’s voice. He hates this. He hates himself for making this happen. It’s easiest to rip it off like a band-aid, right?

“I’m just mad that I'm not one of those gorgeous people. Well, you always turn my head, but there’s- there’s not much to look back at, right?” Keith chuckles, cause he knows if he doesn’t he’s going to cry for real.

“What does that mean?” Keith’s way too focused on not crying to notice how Noah’s sat up now, scanning Keith’s face like a madman, trying to figure out what’s about to come out of his mouth.

“I like you. And I’ve spent like a month watching everyone else love on you and get pissed at them, and then get pissed at me for being mad cause you’re your own guy. I don’t own you, you don’t have to check people by me, I don’t get to be jealous. We’re not like that, and we won’t be like that, cause you don’t like me like that, and it’s cool but it’s not.” Keith’s never felt so light and so heavy at the same time. The words seemed to just sit in the empty air, pressing steadily on the thread that keeps them together. Either they’re going to be pulled closer into each other, or the thread’s going to snap. Keith’s moved as far as he can though. Now it’s all up to Noah.

“You don’t like me.”

And the thread snaps.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Keith shoots up, not caring about the tears running down his cheeks now. Noah’s curled up now, hugging his knees and looking out at the nothingness in front of them.

“You don’t like me. You like my new look, my ‘vibe’ or whatever. So many people have been different to me just cause I look cooler. People have told me they’re into me now, but they’re not. They’re into how I look.” Noah sighs, way too deep and heavy for such a tiny frame. “I didn’t want that to be the reason you’re acting different too.”

“Yeah, I’m acting different cause everyone else is acting different with you! I didn’t have to worry about being super jealous before beefcake jocks and cute cheerleaders were chatting you up!” Keith’s sure he sounds almost hysterical, but it doesn’t matter. He slides off the hood and stands right in front of Noah, trying to get him to look at his face.

“Just drop it man. The hype will die down soon and no one will care again, and everyone is gonna remember that I’m not whatever they’ve got in their heads and I’m just some dorky kid,” Noah says. He won’t look up at Keith, but Keith can still see the tension in his shoulders. He can still hear the strain on his voice. He can still read the kid like a book, and right now it’s  _ Game of Thrones _ level miserable.

“Look at me,” Keith says. Noah shrinks in on himself the tiniest bit, so Keith puts his hand on the side of his neck, craning his head to finally look at Keith.

“I like you. Yeah, I dig the new look-” Noah starts to look flighty again, and Keith pulls him back, “-but I dig it because it’s you. Because you’re smiling bigger than ever, you look confident. But you’re still you. That’s what I like. The dorky kid I met in an improv club with the too big glasses and the nerdy jokes. The guy who made me laugh so hard I fell down in a 7/11 and hit my head on the chip rack.” Noah snorts, and Keith feels like he won the lottery.

“I like all of the dumb, nerdy, completely ridiculous things about you. I like how you make me laugh no matter what. I like that making you laugh is the highlight of my day. I like your smile, your laugh, your stupid face when you’re studying or concentrating on anything really. I lo-” Keith cuts himself off. He’s said those exact words to Noah a thousand times before, but it’s different now, isn’t it. This is putting everything on the line. What if Noah wasn’t cool with being in that deep? What if he was reading this wrong and Noah wasn’t into him at all? What if-

Noah finally looks him in the eye, and nothing else matters.

“I love you. All of you.” It’s the quietest Keith has been all night, but it seems to ring out in the tiny space between them.

The ringing stops as Noah closes the space and kisses him though, so it’s fine by him.

**Author's Note:**

> i have a few more fic ideas i'll probably post coming up, so stay tuned folks!  
if you have a prompt or you wanna just yell about smosh, i'm smoshs-most-feral on tumblr!  
3-26-20 edit  
Holy cow!!! Thanks to everyone coming over from the fanfic video on smosh pit (!!!!!) the love is so nice especially in the midst of the chaos of the world rn. ❤


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